30 in 30: No. 14 - Single and Looking

In 30 days I will be turning 30. I’m actually really excited about turning 30 and I’ve decided to enter into this transition intentionally. For the next 30 days I will be writing a blog a day about an event, person, experience that has had a significant impact on the woman that I am today and who I am becoming

I’m fairly confident that my family thought I would never get married. You see, I come from a family with a number of sisters. Each of my sisters got married when they were 19. My twin brother got married when he was 23 so the fact that I made it to the ripe old age of 28 before I got married turned some heads for sure. Allow me to give you some examples.

We were at a family reunion one summer and my grandma asked me, “so, do you have a boyfriend yet?” I declined and my uncle David, having overheard shouted across the play structure, “How about a GIRLFRIEND?” I laughed and said, “Not a girlfriend either.”

Later that year, at Christmas I was opening presents and I received the following gifts,

1) Mr. Wonderful- a talking doll who says things like “You know honey, why don't you just relax and let me make dinner tonight.” “You've been on my mind all day. That's why I bought you these flowers.” And “The ball game isn't really that important, I'd rather spend time with you.”

2) A tiny glass frog with a poem about a frog prince and a pair of socks with a frog prince on them.

3) And (here’s the clincher) a t-shirt that said “Single and Looking.” (any of these items standing alone might have had endearing qualities).

And, to top it all off, at weddings, as soon as it was time for the bouquet toss, people would shout my name. I’m sure many of you know that in my bouquet catching years, I caught TEN.

Even though there were times when it seemed impossible that someone would actually choose ME, for the most part I was confident that in time, that person would come into my life. I decided long ago, that I did NOT want to be a lamenting single. I was not going to feel sorry for myself, scour young adults groups for “Mars Hill’s Most Wanted,” or isolate myself from my married friends. Instead I decided to make some intentional decisions about who I was going to be in my single years. I decided that:

-I would enjoy and learn from my married friends.
-I would be intentional about becoming a version of myself that someone would benefit from partnering with. I would deal with the crap instead of depending on someone else to fix it.
-I would become independent, pay my own bills, put together my own furniture instead of calling a guy friend to help me.
-I would be an example to the women who I was leading.
-And I would LOVE the heck out of my nieces and nephews!!

There is so much more I could say here. I missed Eric every day before I met him, HOWEVER… I would not take a day back of my single life, because I believe that those days are the days that made me who I am today. I love how my story was written. I had 10 years outside of my parents’ house on my own to figure out who I am and who I wanted to be as a woman AND as a wife and I believe that Eric benefits from those years I had on my own. I imagine the wife I would have been at 20 or 21 and I am so thankful that Eric got me now when I’m almost 30.

And if Eric is the result of waiting for what’s right…. I am SO glad that I waited because you know what? Even if he didn’t say “The ball game isn't really that important, I'd rather spend time with you.” I got BOTH “You know honey, why don't you just relax and let me make dinner tonight.” AND “You've been on my mind all day. That's why I bought you these flowers.” TONIGHT! I guess I got my Mr. Wonderful after all.